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Bullying

Bullying

 

Interactive Anti-Bullying Tool

The Anti-Bullying Alliance interactive tool for parents and carers has had amazing feedback, with over 85% of parents finding the information they were looking for.

 

My Child is Being Bullied

Young people feel they often have to deal with bullying alone, and your child may worry that telling you will make you angry or upset. It is important that you have the tools you need to keep your child safe, happy and free from bullying.

The Diana Award  - Supporting Your Child If They Are Being Bullied - A Guide for Parents & Carers covers what bullying is; the effects it can have on both child and parent; the role and responsibility of your child's school; finding the right support for your child (whether bullied, bully or bystander); and effectively taking action to stand up against bullying.

 

My Child is Accused of Bullying Others

It is very difficult for parents and carers when they find out that their child has been involved in a bullying incident - perhaps even more so if their child is the one accused of bullying behaviour. 

The important thing to remember is that anyone is capable of bullying behaviour. As parents you have a key role in helping your child to recognise the harm they have caused and encouraging them to change their behaviour in the future.  All parents and carers should speak to their children about what bullying is - and how it makes people.

 

They need to feel they can talk to you if there is bullying happening in their class or school. Sometimes children and young people can be pulled into bullying behaviour by friends or the wider peer group - this is particularly true of hurtful comments and images spread through social networking sites. Some top tips for parents include:

  • Make sure your child knows what bullying behaviour is and why it is wrong

  • Make sure your child knows they can talk to you, or to another adult if they are worried about bullying

  • Help your child to realise that no one has the right to pressure them into something they don't want to do - this includes bullying others

  • Make sure they are not bullying others in retaliation for bullying they have suffered - find out if there is a wider culture of bullying in the school or environment where it's happened

  • Talk to your child about information that is shared through social networking sites - let them know that they shouldn't upload comments or images that could hurt someone else - or pass on content that is designed to hurt someone else. Let them know most social networking sites have report buttons if they have seen bullying behaviour and they want to stop it.

  • Make it clear that you do not tolerate the use of disrespectful and hurtful language and behaviour as a family (it's vital that you model this as parents)

If the school contact you to say your child has been involved in bullying incident stay calm and make sure you gather all the facts relating to the incident. Ask to see evidence if it is available (for example: if the alleged bullying is through the internet or phones).  Ask for a copy of the school anti-bullying and behaviour policy so you can ensure that they are following agreed procedures. Take time to listen to your child's side of the story - but keep an open mind.  If the school share information or evidence that shocks you (children can sometimes behave very differently away from their parents) again stay calm, and take time to talk through the incident with your child.  Try not to see the behaviour as a permanent reflection of their character - but make clear the behaviour you would like to change.  It may be that their current friendship group is having a negative effect on their behaviour - in which case you should talk about what it means to be a friend, and gently encourage them to form more positive relationships.

 

Advice and Support

  • Counselling Directory - Lists a network of counsellors, enabling visitors to find a counsellor close to them and appropriate for their needs.
  • Family Lives - Gives support and advice for parents on any aspect of parenting and family life, including bullying (previously Parentline Plus): 0808 800 2222.
  • Internet Matters - Provides regularly refreshed content to support parents and carers with all aspects of e-safety. Includes lots of advice on technology that can help you to protect your child online and helpful content relating to cyberbullying.
  • Kidscape - Provide workshops for children that need support with bullying issues as well as a helpline for parents and carers.
  • NSPCC and O2 - Offer a free online safety helpline for parents and carers: 0808 8005002 

  • Ofsted Parent View - Website featuring an online questionnaire that allows parents and carers to give their views on their child's school at any time of the year. The questionnaire asks for parents for their opinion on 12 aspects of their child's school, from the quality of teaching, to dealing with bullying and poor behaviour, with a final question as to whether or not they would recommend the school to other parents.

  • PACE (Parents Against Child Exploitation) - Provides a parent helpline tto offer advice about online safety.

  • Red Balloon Learner Centres - Provide intensive, full-time education for children aged between 9 and 18 who feel unable to return to school because they have been severely bullied. There are Red Balloon Centres all over England, and they also have a programme of online support.
  • Report Harmful Content Online - A website that has support about reporting harmful content (provided by the UK Safer Internet Centre and South West Grid for Learning).

  • Stop It Now - Confidential helpline about child sexual exploitation.
  • Talking about Race and Racism - Offers advice on speaking confidently about race and racism with young people. The British Red Cross have also produced a new guide to help you create a safe space for discussions. It also includes a range of activities to help learners develop understanding and awareness.

  • Welldoing - An independent, UK-wide directory of therapists and counsellors who are all members of reputable professional organisations. There is a separate search function for children and adolescents in need of therapists and counsellors. It also supplies information and advice in the areas of mental health, wellbeing and development. 


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